For many years I’ve used #findingthejoy on my social media posts about things that bring meaning and pleasure to my life. Living amid massive political turbulence has made me question whether it’s appropriate to keep using that hashtag, and even the word in general. How can life be joyous right now when so many people are being hurt and terrorized while our government is dismantled day by day? I struggled with that question for a while but I’ve concluded that it’s more important than ever to be purposeful about finding joyful experiences and things that are good for our mental health, so we can be strong and continue to resist the rise of fascism here. We need to celebrate life and demonstrate that they cannot crush our spirit.

Two things that have been consistent sources of joy in my life are books and knitting. (I’ll get to the books below.) After the terror attacks of 9/11/2001, I began knitting as a way to calm myself in a world that had suddenly become scarier than ever before in my lifetime. Knitting has brought me friends and given me enormous pleasure over the years. Using gorgeous yarns and my favorite types of wood needles, I make beautiful sweaters, shawls, and scarves to keep myself and my friends warm. Each one is made of thousands of stitches created one-by-one, with loving intention woven into every loop around the needles. Over the years I’ve made dozens of sweaters for myself, as well as a lace christening gown for a friend’s baby, hats for charity, and shawls for friends enduring illnesses. It’s deeply satisfying to continue this endlessly-engaging craft form that has been carried down through the ages. I slipped away from knitting for a few years as I was focused more on being outdoors searching for dragonflies and other insects, but now I’m back to knitting every day. Nature is therapy, and so is knitting. I still love bugs, but this summer has been so unbearably hot that I don’t enjoy being outside for long. I’m definitely looking forward to cooler fall temperatures when the goldenrods and asters will be buzzing with lots of insect activity. In the meantime, the nighttime mothing events have been a way for me to indulge my insect love when the sun isn’t beating down on us.

Most of my knitting projects use wool or wool blend yarns, but this summer I’ve finally dipped my toe into cotton knitting. There are different considerations in making a garment with cotton; the main one is that it doesn’t have the memory of wool, and a 100% cotton garment can stretch out easily. My first couple projects were with heavier weight wool-and-cotton blend yarns, and the resulting garments weren’t flattering on me. Then I found a lovely 100% cotton yarn by Berroco, a longtime favorite yarn manufacturer. Their Pima 100 was a perfect candidate to make a new version of one of my own designs, Kiyo (“Kee-oh”). I published this pattern in 2006 and it became one of my best sellers until I closed my pattern design business about five years later. It took me four weeks to make this Kiyo, with shorter sleeves because I didn’t buy enough yarn for it. I was thrilled with how it turned out and it’s so soft. But there’s a problem: it’s a bit too tight on me. I think I was overly optimistic that I would have lost enough weight by now for the size I chose to make. I’ve lost 20 pounds this year, but I’ve stalled out over the past two months on my way to a goal of dropping 40 pounds. So disappointing to not be able to wear this garment that I’m so proud of! What to do, what to do?

Oh, I know — I’ll make another one in the next larger size! Is that crazy? Maybe, but I’m committed now. Yesterday I went to my favorite local yarn shop in Ann Arbor, Spun, and bought more of the same Pima 100 yarn, but this time in a lovely turquoise color called ‘Aloha.’ If I keep up the same pace I should still have time to wear it in late September and October. And if I make more progress on my weight loss, I think the larger size will still be fine, just a little looser. And I’ll be able to wear the first one next summer. Fingers crossed for that!

I dawdled in Spun as I was choosing my yarns, because I just love being in a yarn store. The colors and fibers and sample knitted sweaters…it’s all overwhelming in the best way. Aisle after aisle of color, wood floors that creak just the right amount, and comfortable furniture if you want to sit and knit a while. So cozy.

And speaking of being pleasantly overwhelmed, I went to my library today planning only to get a few DVDs to watch as I knit in the evenings. But of course I ended up roaming the stacks and picked up a copy of the enormous The Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett, which I read many years ago and want to read again. It requires some self-discipline for me to not allow myself to be distracted by the hundreds of shorter books on my to-read list, but I’m going to go for it. I remember being surprisingly enthralled by the construction of a cathedral in 12th century England. I’d love to read the other books in this five-volume series, but their size is quite intimidating for a mind that has trouble focusing these days, but we’ll see how it goes.

Just before I left the library, I discovered a display of coffee table books that I’d never noticed before, and landed a couple treasures. They’re both graphic representations of some important natural history topics: trees and insects. Insectopolis is the story of some bugs who visit a library’s insect display; isn’t that a fantastic way to approach this subject? I’m enchanted by its illustrations and can’t wait to sit down with it.

And The Hidden Life of Trees by Peter Wohlleben looks just as interesting.

Carrying these big, heavy books out of the library today brought back my childhood memories of walking the seven blocks home from the library carrying as many books as I could manage. The library was my favorite place to be from a very young age, and has remained so for decades. I used to have a fantasy of getting accidentally locked in a bookstore or library overnight so I could explore ALL THE BOOKS. Actually, I still have that fantasy. And if you’ve ever seen the Twilight Zone episode called “Time Enough at Last,” you’ll know that there’s an important caveat to this scenario. In that 1959 episode, the bookworm bank teller played by Burgess Meredith was always frustrated by a lack of time to read in between customers. Until the unthinkable happens and he finds himself alone in the world with all the time in the world for reading. He’s delirious with joy. And then he steps on his glasses and breaks them. I felt that one deeply, let me tell you!

I hope you’re staying strong and healthy, finding your joy, and holding hope that America will rise from this time with renewed strength and purpose as part of the world of nations. Tell me what gives you joy, please!